POWERFUL POSITIVE PARENTING

What are some of the most common parenting concerns? 

Different Parenting Styles:

Just as you are molding your child, your parents molded you.  More than likely, you use many of the same techniques your parents did.  After all, they “trained” you how to navigate this world.

Were you raised by a parent who barked out commands?  If so be honest, do you catch yourself barking out commands too?  Perhaps your parents were laid back and you find yourself similarly carefree. Or maybe you've vowed to avoid your parents' mistakes at all costs and parent in a completely opposite manner. Regardless--whether we follow in our parental footsteps or chose to avoid them-- our personal approach is the result of those who influenced us the most.

You can bet your spouse (or co-parent) has learned from the past as well. He or she is also the product of upbringing. These ingrained differences can easily cause discord and division within the household, something kids are really good at recognizing—and taking advantage of.  Not to mention how quickly parental disagreements can wear down a couple.

Unfortunately, unless they're addressed these disagreements will likely grow. These differences affect two-parent households, blended families and split households (don't expect your parenting disagreements to improve after a separation).

Ineffective Parenting Styles/Techniques

Not only do parenting styles differ, not all of our methods are also as effective as we think.  Learning to recognize your parenting style is the first step. If you have a co-parent, it’s helpful to understand their style, and if possible become a cohesive unit (even if you parent from two households). Regardless of whether you are a married or single parent, consistency is key. You'll always be honing your skills through your parenting years.  Learning the best techniques now can change your entire household and build the foundation your children will model for life!

Tantrums, Behavior Issues

Tantrums are not just for toddlers. Teens experience temper tantrums too!  Temper tantrums are the reaction a child has when caught between stages of dependence and independence and the fears and frustrations that result from the inner turmoil.  Toddlers and teens, alike, experience phases where they must learn to spread their wings—and can—but with severe limitations working against them such as parental rules, uncertainty or immaturity. Certainly, tantrums are not the only behavior issues parents face. Children of all ages are prone to test boundaries and behave inappropriately.  It is very important for parents to note that just like tantrums, there’s a reason behind the negative behavior. Uncovering each reason (whether a physical or mental ailment including stress and anxiety, pushing those boundaries, poor judgment, or even reacting to an ineffective parenting technique) will not only help you properly address the behavior, but increase your ability to reduce future events.

What else does it take to improve your child's behavior? Learning the most effective parenting style and techniques, maintaining structure and consistency, as well as learning how to choose and enforce appropriate consequences.

ADHD, Autism and Other Concerns

Many affordable services can be found right here in our community that support children (and adults) with ADHD, ADD and autism.  If you’re concerned your child may be at risk, I highly recommend speaking with your child’s pediatrician, a trusted school counselor or licensed professional in your area. Trust your instinct. Sometimes it takes years of patience and persistence to find your child the right support. You’ll likely benefit from specialized courses that address these specific concerns.

Achieve Life Balance offers general parenting coaching and does not offer counseling service, evaluations or target specific health conditions or disabilities.  Providing a cohesive, consistent and structured environment creates an atmosphere that allows children to flourish.  Furthermore, if you have other children at home, general parenting classes can provide the tools that will ensure you’re able to meet their needs too.

 Parental Stress, Depression, Anxiety and Stress In Children

Our children can honestly say we don’t understand what it’s like to grow up in their generation. Social media and the internet have changed how our children learn and interact with one another.  Apps can hide much of our children’s activities in seconds, and bullying can be amplified in the blink of an eye.  Our children are communicating with strangers who may be thousands of miles away or, gasp, just around the corner. Research is showing that constant media use by our youngest population, is dangerously impacting their physical and mental development.  We haven’t even touched upon the heavy demands now seen in both sports and academics.

Now add parental stress.  We’re also learning how to navigate an interactive, over-stimulated, get-it-now society.  We think our kids spend too much time on their phone or online but we fail to see we are emulating this behavior.  Both moms and dads need to work long hours, meaning there’s less time to tend to family obligations and individual needs.  Single households are rising, and co-parents are often at odds. You may be facing stressors out of your control such as caring for a sick parent, money, health or job-related issues. Stressed parents churn out stressed kids and vice versa.  We are all on overload.

If you’re concerned about depression, or any family member suffers from anxiety or severe stress please contact a licensed professional.  Stress impacts your health and how we parent. Even more significant—if you’re stressed, you can bet your children are too! Not only are your children emulating your stress; they're learning how to cope by watching you! Achieve Life Balance teaches simple techniques that can help you navigate everyday stressors, including parenting issues.

Create a household that is calm and readily managed.  Teach your children methods that will enable them to make better decisions and effectively problem solve.

 Instilling Values

You don’t just want to raise independent adults, you  want safe, happy children with solid values.   And not just any values, YOUR values.   Before you can implement these values in your child, you must recognize exactly what those values are.  Do you want your child to be strong? Successful?  Kind? Humble? Honest? Outgoing? Religious? Tolerant?   Hmmm.  I bet there’s a lot more values than you realized.  And what about your spouse (or co parent) do you share the same values?  Are you sure?  Maybe you have similar values, but they’re not ranked on the same level of priority. No worries: it’s never too late to instill values in your child (although the earlier, the better).  

A parenting coach can help you:  1) recognize and determine your values 2) recognize and determine your co parent’s values 3) prioritize and choose the most significant values on both lists 4) Implement those values into everyday living.

In addition to instilling values, you want to ensure your child has experienced all of the necessary life lessons to become fully independent. But what are these life lessons and how do I fit them in along with everything else I must teach my children?

Life Lessons

When I went to school I was required to take home economics, along with household accounting and drafting. Today kids can take amazing courses in high school, from college-based photography courses to high-tech computer design, while life basics are rarely covered.  And yet every adult (man and woman) should know the basics: how to cook, clean, organize, balance a checkbook, manage money, change a tire and general household repair. These aren't innate lessons. If no one takes time out to teach our kids, they will not learn.

But with a bit of forethought, and yes, some basic time management, you can fit in many of these necessary life lessons and even increase that valuable family time! 

Am I Doing a Good Job?

Just the fact that you’re seeking parenting tools suggests you’re interested in your child’s best welfare.  Not only do you want your child to be safe, secure and well-adjusted, you want the best for your child.  For most parents seeking parenting advice, the real question isn’t: “Am I doing a good job?” it’s: “What can I do better?”

Our kids learn from us.  All. The. Time. They’re watching us.  They’re constantly modeling our behavior:   the good, the bad and the indifferent. With all of the stress and adversity our children face today, in the midst of all the external messages, you remain your child’s greatest influence.

Your parenting style has a tremendous impact on the foundation and future of these precious individuals. If you have a young tot that time may seem too far away to contemplate--but believe me, it really does fly by. And if you have a teen--well, you may already be aware of just how few "molding" moments you have left.  Suddenly, you find yourself wondering: “Is she ready for the real world?  Did I prepare him enough?” Or maybe you're fretting over the "If only's..." or "I should have...".

Gain insight into the most effective parenting methods available using Positive Parenting techniques.

Positive Parenting Skills Are Extremely Valuable & Absolutely Worth It!

A good parenting class or parenting coach, particularly one that focuses on positive parenting methods, can help you gain significant insight into your child(ren)'s world. The right class can help you modify your parenting techniques, honing in on your best skills while eliminating ineffective ones.  Parenting classes can help you bring structure back into your home, improve co-parenting concerns, make discipline simple and address behavior issues. A recent study suggests there are 10 very specific factors that significantly impact a child for life, including their level of happiness, your relationship with your child and their future relationships, as well as how successful they are.  While our goal is to raise that independent, self-sufficient adult, we also want children who are comfortable in their own skin, who trust their emotions, decisions and feel capable and confident enough to take on their world—as an adult—and as a child navigating an adult world.